


Beardless Blues

by trapezoidscheme



Category: Parks and Recreation
Genre: Trans Character, and millicent gergich, listen. tom is trans, so is jean ralphio
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-11
Updated: 2017-03-11
Packaged: 2018-10-02 12:11:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10217729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trapezoidscheme/pseuds/trapezoidscheme
Summary: Tom fucks up his shaving routine and The Dysphoria hits him like a ton of bricks.





	

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck!” The razor vibrated in the highest setting, forgotten, in Tom’s hand as he stared into the mirror in defeat. There was a perfect stripe of smooth skin, right through the middle of the scruffy facial hair that he worked so hard to cultivate. He swore again, rubbing his newly shaven chin.

Tom walked into the office, clutching his coffee and keeping his eyes firmly glued to the ground.

 “Why do you look like a girl?” Tom looked up, startled. April’s stony look swept over his chin and he chuckled nervously.

“Dude, what happened to your face?” Andy’s head popped out from behind April. So that’s why April looked taller than usual, she was sitting on Andy’s lap. Tom shrugged.

“Accidentally used the wrong razor this morning. Whoosh, there goes the stubbly-dubbly.” He paused and made some finger guns in April and Andy’s direction. “That’s what I call stubble.” Andy grinned and Tom quickly swept into his and Leslie’s shared office.

“What’s wrong, Tom?” Leslie asked, narrowing her eyes at his unusually slumped shoulders and taking a sip of her coffee. Of course she’d figure out something was wrong, that woman had eyes like a person with good eyes, but Tom was kind of hoping to avoid confrontation in the first five minutes of his day. He decided that another shrug was the best course of action and did just that, slumping into his office chair and beginning to boot up his computer. There was a thump of Leslie’s coffee mug hitting the desk and a creak of her chair as she got up to perch on his desk. Tom snuck a glance at the clock. 8:15 was way too early for an emotional heart-to-heart, really.

“Come on Tom, you can tell me.” She said in her gentle voice. Tom hated the gentle voice. “Is it…” she lowered her voice, “girl troubles?” Tom sputtered, standing up from his chair with his heart in his throat. Objectively, he knew she was talking about troubles with girls, not troubles as a girl, but you never know with Leslie.

“You know what, Les’? You’re cool and all, but I don’t have to deal with this right now.” He spread his arms wide, backed out of the office, and took up a quick jog to the courtyard, trying not to think about Leslie’s hurt eyes glued to his back.

He sat down at a table and put his head in his hands, shoulders shaking with the effort of fighting off the impending tears. If Jean-Ralphio could have a bare face, then he could too, surely. But Jean-Ralphio didn’t care what people thought of him, and Tom cared. A lot. This wasn’t how he wanted this day to go.

“Hey Tom!” Jerry said cheerfully, his mouth full of what used to be a perfectly good sandwhich but was now just bread, meat, and lettuce coated in Jerry-spit. Tom jumped a foot in the air, letting out an undignified shriek that didn’t help his situation at all.

“Godamnit Jerry, you scared the shit out of me!” Tom swiped at his eyes, hoping his anger would cover up whatever Jerry just saw.

“I’ve been sitting here the whole time, Tom,” Jerry said indignantly, like he expected Tom to be tracking his every move.

“Whatever Jerry, just go away.” Tom grumbled, putting his head down on the cold metal of the table and going back to his wallowing.

“I know what you’re going through, you know,” said Jerry. Tom wished he would shut up. “I saw some mail for you, addressed to Ms. Haverford.” Tom sucked in a breath. Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Fuck. “My daughter is like that too, you know.” Jerry continued, his mouth now blessedly sandwich-free. This caught Tom’s attention.

“Really? Millicent?” Tom said, reluctantly raising his head up to meet Jerry’s eyes. Jerry nodded, taking another bite of his sandwich. “No shit.” Tom marveled. “And the Traeger-meister was…”

“Okay with it?” Jerry finished for him. “Oh yeah, Millie told me he gave her a four-hour pep-talk on how much of a beautiful woman she was and how much he loved her regardless of everything,” Jerry chuckled, shaking his head. “It was very sweet.” That made sense, Tom figured. Chris was good at going above and beyond with being the perfect boyfriend.

“Does Leslie know?” Jerry asked suddenly, watching Leslie peek through the shutters of her office into the courtyard. Tom pretended not to notice.

“No.” Tom said simply, and left it at that. Jerry shrugged and went back to his sandwich, tearing into it like it was the last thing he had in his life that was good. It probably was, poor guy.

“Thanks, Jerry.” Tom forced out after a few minutes of silence, pointedly staring at the table and ignoring the look of surprise on Jerry’s face. He should probably be extra mean to him tomorrow to make up for this, Tom thought, already drafting a litany of insults in his head.

“Anytime, Tom!” Jerry said cheerfully. Tom told him to shut up and left the courtyard, somehow feeling better.


End file.
